They're not just a bunch of pretty faces, either! They're very generous and thoughtful! They're quick to buy round of drinks, and they're always volunteering to drive drunk fellas home from the bar! They're known county-wide for giving aid to hitchhiking run-aways and other wayfaring strangers. And they're considerate enough to orientate all the new prisoners at the regional jail where they work as guards.
During the courtship period you can spend time at the beautiful farmhouse they inherited. These three are very handy, so there have been some notable improvements made to the property. You and the suitor of your choice will enjoy romancing one another in the splendor of the new above-ground pool, soundproof shed, and modified basement. The living room was also recently redecorated with help from The Room Store.
I think I've said enough to get any red-blooded woman's juices flowing! So run, (don't walk!) to the comments section and tell me why you think you'd be right for one of these handsome gents. I'll be screening all applicants, because I'm not trying to introduce them to any weirdos! Hairless women, non-human mammals, and pre-op transsexuals need not apply!
Posts
3 comments:
So post-op trannies are okay??
looks like they still have the hots for YOU though
this is so weird
didn't the cutest one's twin brother recently get out of prison after doing 18 months for shaving his girlfriend's head with a dull machete when he caught her cheating on him ?
(did they ever find what was left of her body ?)
it's kinda hard to tell with their clothes on, but I think they may be my cousins also !
and you don't have to sell me, girlfriend, cuz I know for a fact that they are all hung like muskrats !
also, how soundproof ?
there are different levels and most people are lazy and go the cheapest route.
if it's built by those people who offer a double-your-money-back guarantee, then please consider me for any left-overs.
(if I remember right, the competition has always been fierce with these three, so I don't expect to get first choice)
some of my qualifications:
* I have a pretty comprehensive collection of my neighbour's cat paws (I've had offers).
* ..almost graduated (6th grade), but got preggers..
(how's this for "ironic twist" ?
it might have been buckie's !
(or maybe richie's.. my school-days were such a blur)
if so, I'm not exactly sure where he's at, but I can make some calls and track him down in only a couple months).
* and also have limited access to a copy of every handcuff key since the 1st depression (hey, I know some people, if you get my drift)
* and I don't usually brag, but I still have most of my teeth (not quite as many as you, tho)
so, I know you don't owe me..
but would REALLY be grateful for a little nepotism here
waiting with baited breath
(literally)
<3
ps:
I don't have your "elbow-in-the-crotch" skills,
so in the event that I just can't land one of these puppies..
how about you and me "cha-cha-cha-ing" ?
(is your "open relationship" really open, or is it limited to those with "dangle-y bits" ?)
Post a Comment